My Trans Journey

I'm Cory. Grayaro, grayace, autistic, queer, trans masculine, genderfluid demiboy. I am white and can be male passing. I appreciate feedback, criticisms, call outs, etc. I do not welcome truscum. I'm an atheist, but I do not welcome atheists who are anti-religion.

Preferred pronouns: they/them/their

This blog started out being about my personal journey in transitioning my gender, but now it's really just my general personal blog. Though it tends to be all about the social justice. But also, Pokemon.

DISCLAIMER ONE: THIS TUMBLR IS FULL OF TRIGGERS. I talk about suicide, discrimination, and probably all kinds of things will come up. I try to provide trigger warnings, though most of my older posts (over a year old at least) aren't tagged appropriately. Please let me know if you need me to tag for something.

DISCLAIMER TWO: My experiences, feelings and opinions do not speak for all trans people.

I also have a tumblr where I post art and sell plushies here: http://evilcorynn.tumblr.com/

Facebook Adds Gender-Neutral Terms for Family Members

I appreciate this change!  But remember, for folks with trans family, be sure you know what gender your family member wants to be referred to as before making changes to any defaults.  Some folks aren’t out, and FB’s changes have resulted in some people being accidentally outed to coworkers/schoolmates/etc.  Plus, if they are trans binary, and have their gender set the way they want it displayed, then you shouldn’t have to make any changes on FB.  It will display what they selected by default.

But with non-binary folks, if they didn’t pick male or female, then it just seems to randomly select brother/sister, daughter/son, etc (for example, it said I was my mom’s son, and my brother’s brother, but my sister’s sister).

To get to the page where you edit this info, go to your profile page and click on About.  Then click on Family and Relationships.  Then click edit next to the name of the person that needs to be updated.

(via metapianycist)

evilcorynn:

I did this thing:
Handwritten Post
  • 1:Write your URL in some writing that you thought were super cool when you were younger. Eg, bubble letters, digital clock letters, letters with lots of embellishments, or letters with smiley faces in them.
  • 2:Write a list of all the countries or states you’ve been to. Write a comment on each of them. Or some, if you can’t be bothered.
  • 3:List your top three statistical Tumblr crushes and draw their icons.
  • 4:Draw a selfie.
  • 5:Name three things you like about yourself.
  • 6:Do you like the climate you live in? What do you like about it or what would you change?
  • 7:What is your current mood? Write and/or draw.
  • 8:Can you tie a bow-tie? A regular tie? If yes, how and when did you learn?
  • 9:Pick something from your immediate surroundings and tell the story behind the item.
  • 10:The last time you noticed you’d put a piece of clothing on incorrectly, i.e. backwards/inside out/etc?
  • 11:What is a typical breakfast for you?
  • 12:How do you take your favorite coffee? Eg strong or weak? Black or with cream/milk and/or sugar/sweetener? Filter, espresso, French press or instant? Hot or iced? Regular or decaf? None of the above?
  • 13:Describe your favorite food. Who makes it?
  • 14:List 5 movies that you love.
  • 15:What is a wanky memory from Tumblr that still makes you blush?
  • 16:What brought you to Tumblr?
  • 17:Have you had any real Tumblr crushes? If you want to keep your mystery, answer with a drawing.
  • 18:Do you prefer to text or call your friends?
  • 19:Write an autograph version of your URL.
  • 20:Pick up the nearest printed material in your first language and copy out a random paragraph.

Today, we donated some of grandpa’s old stuff.  Mom said, “I wish he didn’t keep so much stuff around.  He kept everything, even if he knew it wasn’t worth anything!  I used to tell him we have too much junk and he’d just laugh and say, ‘doesn’t bother me, it’s going to be your problem after I’m gone.’”

My eyes widened.  ”I want to be old and tell people that my mess is their problem.”

We drove in silence for a while, me thinking about the freedom of not having to sort stuff and decide what to keep and what to get rid of.  I whispered, “Living the dream…”

yesmissmori:

THINX Underwear:

OH SHIT YOU GUYS THIS COMPANY IS MAKING UNDERWEAR THAT IS STAIN RESISTANT, ANTIMICROBIAL, AND WILL ABSORB UP TO 6 TEASPOONS OF LIQUID BUT STILL LOOKS FUCKING SEXY

AND DID I MENTION THIS PART:

For every pair of THINX you buy, you help one girl in the developing world stay in school by providing her with seven washable, reusable cloth pads.

AND WHY IS THAT SUCH A BIG DEAL? HERE’S WHY:

After doing some research, Agrawal says she found that more than 100 million girls in the developing world were missing a week of school because of their periods, and using things such as leaves, old rags, or plastic bags in the place of sanitary pads.

THE SIZES RUN FROM XS TO XXL AND THE PRICES ARE NOT BAD, THEY’RE OBVIOUSLY HIGHER THAN THOSE 5 FOR $10 SALES AT TARGET BUT YOU WON’T HAVE TO THROW THEM OUT BECAUSE YOU MISCALCULATED YOUR FLOW AND BLED ALL OVER THEM BEFORE YOU COULD GET TO A BATHROOM

I’M SORRY FOR SHOUTING I’M JUST REALLY EXCITED ABOUT THIS

LIKE HOLY FUCKBASKET IT’S ABOUT DAMN TIME

This is pretty rad, but they don’t have any underwear for trans masculine folks.  I hope they add more designs.  Though I contacted them to ask if they might plan to do that in the future, and they haven’t responded.

I take a lot of ibuprofen, often at prescription levels, for chronic pain and such.  My ear is still really hurting bad, so even with the ibuprofen and various other medicines the doctor gave me, I hurt a lot and I’m tired and I just hate everything.  Even more than usual.

So last night mom asks how I’m doing and I’m all, “ugh, I hurt a lot and hate everything.”  And she says, take some ibuprofen, and I say, “I just took some like an hour ago.”

Mom says, “Just take one more.  It can’t kill you.”

I look up at her and she’s got this glowing compassionate smile, just happy to be taking care of her adult child.  She actually doesn’t understand that it really can kill me if I just throw back extra ibuprofen whenever.  

I love my mom.  I just have to be wary of her medical advice.

It’s been about seven weeks since grandpa died, and four years since grandma died.  Mom has decided I can start packing up all the clothes hanging in the basement that neither of them had worn for years before passing, so we can donate them.

I said to my eleven year old friend, “Want to help me shove a bunch of old clothes into bags?”

"Yeah!" he said.

Before stuffing coats into the bags, I checked the pockets.  My friend asked me why.  I said, “In case there’s money or something else interesting.  If we find money, you and I can split it.”  That got him really excited, so he went through all the pockets.  

But then we ran out of grandpa’s coats, and he found some of mom’s clothes.  I told him not to put those in the bag because I wasn’t sure if she still wanted them.  He asked if he could still go through the pockets and I said no.

"Why not?" he asked.

"Because it’s OK to go through dead people’s pockets, but not living people’s"

He stopped and stared at me.  I paused in packing up clothes and said, “That… didn’t sound quite right.”

"No, it sounded weird!" he said.

I shrugged.  ”It’s basically true though. Dead people don’t care if you go through their stuff.”

In the end, all we found were half-eaten rolls of mints.

Death threats drive Anita Sarkeesian from her home

(via disciplesofmalcolm)

feminaspie:

raginggenderriver:

You know that feeling some people get when they hear or think about fingernails on a chalkboard?

That’s how I feel when I have a wooden popsicle stick in my mouth.  I love popsicles, but I hate those sticks.  They make me shudder, and make my teeth and jaw hurt, my throat closes up and it leaves me nauseous.  When I do eat a popsicle, I usually manage to keep the sticks out of my mouth, but just having them near freaks me out.  It used to not be super bad, so I could still eat popsicles, but lately I don’t even want to look at popsicles.

For the past week or so, things keep reminding me of popsicle sticks and leaving me with that really gross sensation.  Every time I open the freezer I feel it.  Sometimes, just being in the garden makes me feel it.  It’s making me sick and anxious.

I just don’t know what to do about it.

ugh yes i get this too!! i hate the feel of wood in my mouth to the point where even seeing someone use a wooden kitchen spoon makes my mouth feel weird.

could you maybe take the popsicle off the stick and eat it out of a bowl with a spoon? or take it off the stick and wrap it in something (like a bit of clingfilm or something) so you can hold it and eat it maybe?

I’m glad it’s not only me!  If I really want a popsicle, I can get those ones that come in the tubes.  I actually like those a lot.

I think what happened, though, is I kind of forgot about my issue with popsicle sticks, and my mom got these ice cream bars on sticks, and offered me one.  I didn’t think about my issue until I had it in my mouth and it was kind of too late.  Since then, I just can’t get the feeling of popsicle sticks out of my head.  It’s always bugged me, but it’s only been this summer that it’s caused as much anxiety as I’m feeling now.

There’s one more ice cream bar in the fridge.  I think I’ll put it in a bowl and eat it and throw the stick far, far away to see if maybe not having it in the house will help me get it out of my head.

You know that feeling some people get when they hear or think about fingernails on a chalkboard?

That’s how I feel when I have a wooden popsicle stick in my mouth.  I love popsicles, but I hate those sticks.  They make me shudder, and make my teeth and jaw hurt, my throat closes up and it leaves me nauseous.  When I do eat a popsicle, I usually manage to keep the sticks out of my mouth, but just having them near freaks me out.  It used to not be super bad, so I could still eat popsicles, but lately I don’t even want to look at popsicles.

For the past week or so, things keep reminding me of popsicle sticks and leaving me with that really gross sensation.  Every time I open the freezer I feel it.  Sometimes, just being in the garden makes me feel it.  It’s making me sick and anxious.

I just don’t know what to do about it.